• KBS Is On Fire: The Unreality of War

    KBS Is On Fire: The Unreality of War

    Khan Bani Saad, 20 Miles Northeast of Baghdad, Iraq October, 2006 “What kind of shoes are you going to get, Bob?” “I’m thinking wingtips, something really classy.” “What about a watch? Gold or silver?” “I’m going with silver; it’ll go with anything. Besides, gold is too flashy.” “It’s going to be great to be home.…

  • Ranger School Was Harder Than Iraq (Because I Did Not Have My Brothers)

    Ranger School Was Harder Than Iraq (Because I Did Not Have My Brothers)

    “I woke up in a cold sweat. I had a nightmare that I was still in Ranger School. Thank God I was in Vietnam.” Col. Robert Tex Turner You’re going to think I’m crazy but, at least for this humble mediocre infantryman, Ranger School was harder than Iraq. No, really, it was. I know, it…

  • What is a “Ranger,” Anyway

    What is a “Ranger,” Anyway

    If you ask a bat boy, he’ll give you the narrow definition, “a scroll-wearing member of the 75th Ranger Regiment,” one of the most elite military units in the world, a genuine bada**. According to most everyone else in the Army, it’s much broader: a member of the 75th Ranger Regiment AND/OR a graduate of…

  • Why I Always Carried the Machine Gun

    Why I Always Carried the Machine Gun

    There’s a general rule in Ranger School: if it can be avoided, don’t carry a machine gun, not the SAW, and certainly not the big gun, the 27.6-pound M240B medium machine gun. That is because machine guns are heavier than rifles and have hundreds of rounds of ammo to carry. They are unwieldy and, to make…

  • From the Cutting Room Floor: A Hungry Ranger Has to Eat

    From the Cutting Room Floor: A Hungry Ranger Has to Eat

    I’d be lying if I told you that Iraq was the first time I ate out of the trash. No . . . that dubious honor belongs to Ranger School . . . *** 11:55 p.m., October 2007, Camp Darby, Georgia *** “Psst! Psst! Goldsmith, over here.” Leon and Newton, two of my bat boy…

The Mediocre Infantryman in the News

From the cover of Zarqawi's Ice Cream: Tales of Mediocre Infantrymen, book by Andrew Goldsmith

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